A Tuesday Monday.

waking up this morning after a very productive bank holiday, I still had to remind myself that I’m in stealth mode!

I’m on it! And that means: think assertive, think business woman, think attractive fit woman, think I can control myself woman, think I don’t give a shit what people think woman!

Are people born like this or is it a coming of age thing? 

I also want that Q5, I’ve spent far too long thinking I don’t deserve it: WHAT A LOAD OF SHIT! I work hard, why not!

Being a Christian (if you weren’t aware, this means follower of Christ) plays Havock with your brain and makes you wonder wether you should be giving all your money away to charity. I know I should, but I know far holier people than I that drive around in flash cars DT.

Anger point of the day: why do people feel they have the right to dismiss me or have a go if I say I will pray for them? Do I say that when people offer to think of me at a difficult time?

The Epic to do list

what bugs you? I know what bugs me; its when I set pug to do something and then never quite get there.

I set a goal, but never quite get on the right train or road to its destination. It’s so bloody annoying, I want to be goal driven, aren’t all successful people goal driven? Is it just me that sets a goal and then literally forget that I’ve set it?

I’ve realised that current me is simply useless after this stuff, so it’s me that needs to change;

I’m getting rid of 

1. Slightly overweight me

2. Dizzy forgetful me

3. I can’t remember where it is, or where I put it me.

4. Soft shite me, who smiles at all the mums on the school run, knowing full well some of them really don’t like me.

5. I’ve lost my confidence and mojo me, daring not to voice my opinion for fear of looking dumb in front of group of seemingly higher educated middle class ponces who always seem to know the right thing to say.

6. I only run a tiny online jewellery and gift website me, but I do have a degree and used to hold down a proper job me.

7. Guilty me, who still feels that I wasn’t good enough at me old job and has a stash of hideous memories where I’ve put my foot in it or offended someone by saying the wrong thing.

8. Jealous me, who feels sad about other peoples friendships and jealous when I’m not involved. I guess I just want everyone to love me, but that thought needs to DO ONE too!!!

No! The new me is none of these things and is de cluttering this shite from my life.

The new me enjoys life, remembers that I’m not waiting for improvements. The new me is going out to get them now, is positive and is dealing with the anger, resentment, guilt, jealousy and fear in a new way: it’s all on its way out!

Lisa Lynch, you have a lot to answer for being my inspiration. An unusual motivator if this new path, but perhaps not; you have inspired me to be what I want to be NOW and not sometime in the future that may never come. Thznkyou.

Bank holiday bonus!

well I woke up angry but the day has ended well!

I think channelling my anger into positivity has paid off and I’m really feeling the benefits of a day of de cluttering

I’m getting better at it too; each day my target is to throw away at least two things from each room.

It’s feel refreshing and liberating to get rid rather than hold onto just in case.

Have you thought about what would happen to all that stuff when you die? Well when you e had to sort all the precious belongings of a loved one, it’s cements the fact that ‘you start and end life with nothing’

I’m on a roll, I’m de cluttering my anger; getting rid of people, thoughts, stuff, clutter, little jobs, tasks and more stuff that makes me angry and is getting in the way of me being me.

Anger diary day 2

The Anger Diary day 1